I don’t understand your marriage.

I’m fascinated by marriages.

I love and adore my wife, and quite frankly I enjoy being around her.  If she comes in the room, she gets my attention.  She’s great.

When I have to go somewhere, I make sure Holly knows where I am going.  I used to watch The Cosby Show, and they seemed to have a great marriage.  However, whenever Cliff would have to go to the hardware store or something and Claire would be upstairs or in the other room there would never be one of those “Hey baby, running to the store” things.  He would just go out the door.  This always bothered me.  And the fact she never questioned it bothered me too.  Maybe it was a common understanding that all would be home at like 6:15 or something and just every other time throughout the day was up for grabs or something, I don’t know.  It just all seemed a little inconsiderate to me.

When I come back home from anywhere, I try to find Holly in the house.  I also have seen on TV those guys that come home from selling shoes or something and plop down on the sofa or recliner.  At some point the 12-yr-old comes in the door (having been completely unsupervised all day) and says, “Hey dad, Cindy at the mall did something-or-other” and dad grunts.  Mom comes down and says, “Hey, the O’Brien’s are coming at 7… change your shirt.”  It’s like if she never came down the stairs she would think she was all alone until Jack & Erin O’Brien came ringing the bell.  It all seemed a little unorganized to me.

“Home” is the number that will always be answered if my phone is near no matter who I am with.  I have been with Pastors, Mayors & Police Detectives and have answered Holly’s call.  It’s a given, she knows where I am and I make myself known to her.  Anything else seems odd to me.

The more I am around other marriages I begin to feel as if mine is not the norm.  Not to cast disparaging “whatevers” toward others, but I don’t understand when your husband or wife is treated as if they were just another person.  If in a crowded room with me, there is a chance that I might not get around to talking with you.  If my wife is in the room, I will make my way to her.

There is always an “I love you, baby” or a “Gotta run to (here) but I will be back as soon as I can” or  a “Are you set and is there anything I need to know/pick up/do?”

I’m not sure I see that with other couples.

I thought about this in prayer tonight.  God desperately wants us to want Him, and want to be withHim, and want to know what is going on in His life… and He in yours.  He’s in the other room and wants you to come look for Him.  He standing there in a crowded room and wants you to make the effort to come to Him.  When you want to go somewhere He wants you to check with Him to see if it’s OK or if He wants you do do something for Him.

It’s not control, it’s courtesy.

Just a thought…