In Spite Of…

Studying the last few verses of Romans 2 yesterday spurred some thoughts that I am just now attempting to flesh out.

The generation that is coming (perhaps here now) is hungry for God, but not just the theory or the thoughts… they want the real.  This generation is not coming as previous ones have, because the previous generation had seen “it” before and want what they have seen.  The generation now is coming in spite of what they have not seen.  There is a “gap” that has been, and instead of conforming to the “norm” of power and glory that others before them have walked into, this generation is walking into and creating a new norm of power and glory that steps out of the mundane of what they have grown up in. ~ Me

Now, I’m still working on this in my mind, and last night it led to a few moments of discussion at our church in which the toe of a thought tested the waters of the room.  I believe that the generation that is now (and this is not an age thing) wants more of God.  They desire to see what God can do and know Who He is through His acts as well as His words.  They are hungry not because they have experienced the power and glory, but in spite of the fact that they have seen “a form of Godliness… without the power” and know that this cannot be all that is real.  The stories have been passed down of the goodness of God, but somehow this father-less generation has heard the stories but have missed the evidence that those stories are true.

I see hunger.  I see passion.

I don’t want to miss it.  I hope that I can be a part of the generation that hungers for the “real” and hope upon hope that I will not be categorized in the generation that simply told of the goodness of God and never walked in the demonstration of that goodness.  I don’t wanted to be counted with the “gap” that this generation has to overcome; but I wish to be a catalyst for the movement that God is wanting to do today.

Which is stronger?  The generation that seeks God because they know of God, or the generation that seeks God because they have not known God yet desperately yearn to know Him and will settle for nothing less than the God of power and greatness.  The latter will move past what they have not seen and will run toward what can be and the God of that potential.

The words “fatherless” came my mind while walking through this.  Malachi 4:5-6 speaks of returning the hearts of the fathers to the children and the hearts of the children to the father.  Could this be something?

I might have hit on something here.

I went home last night and picked up a book that had been sitting on my shelf for about a year and a half (almost 2 years).  It is a book by a pastor named Johnny Enlow.  Johnny and I, along with about 14 other men and women shared a week in Israel speaking with dignitaries, military personnel, members of government, businessmen, members of the media and archaeologists.  It was within a month of returning that I resigned my previous church and moved simply because God said so.  You can read more about that here.

I have been in contact with Johnny a couple of times through e-mail since, yet I had not read the book that he had given me at the time.  Frankly, during the year+ of “odd” that this has been, I’m not sure I was in a place to read it and have it hit me like it will now.  So, thanks Johnny, a little late, but thanks.

Here is the passage, and I apologize at the gross copy rite infringement that I am about to do.  The words are from Johnny Enlow in his book The Seven Mountain Prophecy, and it is just the very beginning of the book on page 17-18.  They are his words and thoughts, not mine.  However, the same idea (that he openly admits in the introduction that he is still working through) that I am working through is found.

While something in the heart of people is drawn toward God, His followers have done such bad public relations on His behalf that it’s hard for the world to see Him.  The church is still attempting humanistic solutions to the problems society faces, and our attempts aren’t much more successful than those of unbelievers.  The older generation is dying in church, and the next generation is refusing to enter a dead church.  People who are interested in experiencing presence, power, and authenticity are instead offered baby food or entertainment.  The church is in as much need of a radical shift as the world’s systems are.

Movies, TV, video games, and all other forms of entertainment are increasingly delving into the dark side of that which the church has neglected to manifest in the light.  When the people’s hunger for the supernatural isn’t satisfied in the church, their only other option is to seek out false imitations of the real thing.  Because most branches of Christianity haven’t embraced the prophetic gifts, psychic networks are making billions of dollars – even from Christians – by delivering the counterfeit.  We have been so afraid to preach and demonstrate the God of the impossible that we’ve opened a door for the entertainment industry to quench people’s thirst for the supernatural through shows and movies featuring witches, demons, and sorcerers.  We warn the dangers of the Harry Potter series while denying the validity of true prophecy and healing for today, even though signs and wonders are scripturally non-negotiable.  That is extremely hypocritical. ~ Johnny Enlow

This is helping me know that my thoughts are not that far off track to what might be happening today.  Still fleshing it all out, but hope to walk in what God is doing today and demonstrate who He is not just by words but by mighty acts.

The thoughts are general, and some might have specifics they can dispute; but I believe the general reflects the times.

I see this not as an indictment on the previous, but as an amazement and encouragement based on the wonder in the passion of the present.

Run generation. Run hard and grab what is the Real!

Don’t Tell Me How To Swim

If you’re not going to jump into the water with me, keep your mouth shut when it comes to swimming techniques.

I have found that those who spend a lot of time belittling the actions of another are usually not doing any action themselves.  Sure, we may think what someone is doing is a waste of time, but at least they are doing.  You can always correct midstream, but if you never start then everything is just theory.

I don’t have time for theory.

Action is what matters.  Seeing the need and then jumping in the water is risky and impetuous and scary and maybe seemingly stupid, but the need will never be met by just standing on the bank.

Don’t mock those who are swimming with all of their might.

At least they are in the water.  What are you doing?

Compassion Am I

I just realized that I want to be compassionate.  However, I don’t wish to just be compassionate, I want to be seen as compassionate.

I feel as if I have compassion at times, but I know that is not enough.  Anyone can feel for someone or something in a moment, but what does it really feel like to walk in compassion.  There is a difference between having compassion and being compassionate.  I know this, and even believe in this, but find it hard to live this…

I have lived a fair portion of my life not being compassionate or showing compassion, except at random moments where it seemed as if I couldn’t help myself… that it was someone else living my life through me.  I remember watching Extreme Home Makeover for the first time a few years ago, not really being engaged with the story but just watching the remodeling process at work.  Then, as the man rolled in to his new home in his wheelchair, and the kids were seeing not just a house but hope for the first time in a while, it happened.

I teared up.

I literally got up and walked into the kitchen thinking, “What is wrong with me?”  I didn’t know the people in the story and had watched the whole episode and not blinked and eye, but now I found myself feeling for those in the story.  It was different.

Not being a man of compassion for my whole life, yet now over the past few years desperately wanting to be that man, there are a few things that I need.

I need to be called compassionate.

I must have things spoken over me that are not, so that I am consistently reminded of the standard that I am striving for.  I see and feel the now all too often, and need to walk in what can and will be.  I need to not stoop to the emotion of the immediate circumstance and look for ways for love to flow and grace to overwhelm that circumstance.  I forget what I am reaching for too quickly, and I need someone to tell me (with an unending amount of compassion) who I am longing to be.

I need to be seen as compassionate.

If I don’t want to make those who are speaking compassion over me liars, I need to practice compassion.  I don’t want to be the guy whose funeral consists of the kindhearted saying good things over me and the audience sitting there saying, “I never knew that guy.”  What are the things that I can do that will show compassion.  I need to do them.  I want them to be seen not for my glory because of outside actions, but so I can be encouraged that I am gaining on my inward goal and winning the fight within that no one else sees but God and me.

I need to be compassionate.

It is more than about an act at a random time.  I must not just do compassionate acts, but be compassion.  It must become more than my ethos, it must become me.  In other words, compassion must be my default, my way of viewing the world around me.  I must live by the love that is thought of when we say things like “a little love covers a multitude of sins.”  Compassion that is there when it is not warranted.  That needs to be me.

Only by this compassion can I demonstrate who I want to be.

Honorable.  Loving.  Respectable.  Fearless.

By my God, my wife, and my boys.

Allow Humility

There are several keys to successful leadership in ministry, but one of the main keys is humility.

The humble spirit is what God desires and is what causes the windows of heaven to open to our prayers.  The humble spirit helps us to walk in the assurance that God Himself is in control and our abilities play only a small role in the success of the matter at hand.  The humble spirit helps guard a compassionate heart so we can continue to love like Jesus.

The humble spirit is also seen as a weakness by those who thirst for control.

One of the earliest things a new ministry can develop as part of its ethos is the respect and room for humility in the leadership.

The culture of your church/ministry must allow for humility.  All too often meekness is mistaken for weakness, and a refusal to boast seen as an admission of inability or incompetence.  When there are hidden issues in a “followers” heart, let a humble leader step up to lead and those hidden issues will not be hidden for long.

FOLLOWER, don’t set your default on negative.

The first words out of your mouth should not be… “well that will never work.”  Learn to trust and challenge yourself to grow.

FOLLOWER, don’t assume…

The old adage is true, you really do make a… er, FOOL out of “u” and “me” when you assume.  Here’s the deal, there are times you don’t know what you don’t know.  The humble leader doesn’t brag, although the “assumer” lives and dies by the boast.  Just because you’ve never seen the humble leader dance doesn’t mean he has two left feet.

FOLLOWER, trust your leader.

Quite frankly, if you’re not going to trust the leader then why are you there?  The ministry environment is not a place to plan a coup when you smell blood; so the only reason to submit is that you trust your growth to the person over you.  Remember, while you are sprinting to get to the end of the day the humble leader is running the marathon of eternal ministry.

And, with the full realization that its more possible to fix you than someone else:

LEADER, don’t tell everything you know.

Don’t be the person that others don’t know how good you are until you tell them.  Be an example instead of an explainer.

LEADER, don’t do everything.

There should be somethings that you can do that no one else knows about but you.  This is not hiding your gifts, but it is allowing others to operate in theirs for the glory of God and the furthering of the Kingdom.  Who cares that others think you “can’t.”  You can, its just healthier for them if you don’t.

LEADER, don’t blow up… but suck it up.

As a leader, you are in charge.  That’s not being bossy, but being in authority.  Attempt to stay far away from the line that says to another, “Like it or lump it.”  You can put that message across by actions and walking out the mission and vision with clarity; but I am just saying resist the urge to scream it in the follower’s face.  You’ll feel better for about 15 seconds, and then realize that the 8-year-old with a broken home was standing in the doorway listening.

The reality is that a leader is there for the betterment of the follower.  Followers… allow for your leader to walk in a humble spirit without having to defend his gravitas to you at every turn.

Arrogance, Aloof and Amway

Thinking through the process of planting a new church while flat in the middle of it is not an easy task.  The past few months have been a whirlwind, not to mention the year previous, and living in the midst of a hurricane does not leave much time to sit and ponder in the breeze. For those that might be curious about that which I am referring to can check it out here, along with following my blog regularly.

I am taking this moment of multitasking (sitting at my son’s basketball practice) to ponder and pontificate on a few issues of being a church pastor and, hopefully, a leader that can help impact and change a city.

I gotta have some swagger…

Imagine thinking that anyone would want to hear anything that you might have to say or watch anything that you might do; that people would sit and listen waiting for you to move them.  I think of singers and actors and musicians and think, “Man, they have to have some arrogance to them to get on a stage and just know that the audience is dying to hear them.”  Then, the reality hits me… Bob, that’s what you do.

I speak (among other things) for a living.  Here is what I have to process through:

• I have to feel what I have to say is life-changing… because it is even if I don’t feel like it in the moment.
• I can’t worry about selling myself, because it is not about me.
• I have to continue to improve so I can do what I do well.

I gotta be accessible…

No matter what, I want to be the guy that any can call.  There will be times that others will have to wait, because this is not about being “on call” 24/7, but the need is there for me to be a leader that is accessible.  I cannot afford to be aloof.

I know that I need to get away at times.  I know that I must keep a certain distance in order to speak objectively and with authority in crucial moments, but I cannot be effective if those around me feel as if I don’t care about their felt needs.

I don’t want to sell Amway…

Nothing wrong with it, I guess.  Actually, I still have never been able to figure out what it is.  I just have a few observations when it comes to ministry, and the “Amway” analogy seems to work best.

• I can’t follow the pyramid example… I have to use more of a trapezoid.  Just being silly, but the notion is that I can’t see others that I am speaking to about Christ as notches in my belt.  It becomes performance based, and people are not product.
• I don’t want interaction to be seen as a bait and switch method.  There are blog posts on “using social media” to win others.  While this might be effective, I somehow feel used when I find people that “friend” me just to push an angle or agenda.

I desire to be real, I desire to impact and change a city, I don’t want to be a salesman.  I don’t want to be distant from those that are in need, I want to be the first hand that is there to lift them up.  I want to know that my call is from God, and walk in the humility that I didn’t earn it and the assurance that I don’t do any of it by myself.

2 Days Into 41

I’m thinking of applying for Social Security.

Not really, but when most have a birthday all they seem to think about is getting older.  It is as if the numbers mean something.  The reality is…

You are not as old as you feel because that is stupid, but how old you are doesn’t have to direct how you feel.

Get up.  Do what you do.  The fact is that you are only a day older than you were yesterday, and unless you have had some horrible combine accident then you can do everything you did yesterday.  Get over the number of candles.

You cannot see others your age and judge who you are by them.

Saw a guy on the Biggest Loser show last night that was my age.  He didn’t look my age.  I’m doing a bit better than him… if I do say so myself.  I can’t get cocky about that though, because I had two hostess cupcakes for breakfast today.  You know, there but for the grace of God go I and all of that.

I could also look at some who are much older than me and think I am in horrible shape and am about to die.  I can’t do this.  I have to walk in my own skin, and learn to do what I can do.

You can’t be defined by an event, but use the event as a moment of reflection.

Do not think of all you have not accomplished, but use moments in your life to spur you on to continue from where you are.  You have breath in your body, so breathe.  Take the steps that you need to take today.  A birthday is a great time to appreciate that you just are, and to decide how and who you are going to be.

Tim Tebow, and Answering Unasked Questions…

There is truth to the thought that if you say something enough it becomes an issue.

Politicians succeed in this all of the time.  In politics, it is not so much about resolving issues as it is about setting the debate.  If you can get them talking about what you want them to talk about then you are half way home.  Obama does this, W did this, Clinton, etc.  The other notion is that if you can ask a question, then the premise of that question becomes truth.

Question: Have you stopped beating your wife?

The premise is that you have beaten, or are beating your wife.  It doesn’t matter if you ever have or ever will, ask this question enough of someone then all will believe you are a wife beater.

Now, bordering on the silly and quickly giving instruction:

All sports announcers these days rail on those who have “anointed” Tim Tebow as the next Hall of Famer.  (For those of you who don’t know who Tebow is, I don’t know how to help you with this.)  They qualify with a statement like, “Now I like Tebow, but…” and then talk about how stupid all of those people are who say that he is the next greatest “before he has done anything.”

Here is the deal.  I have never heard any sports announcer say he was a Hall of Famer.  All I have heard is those who talk about those who do.  It seems as if they are trying to prove their point of saying that Tebow is not an NFL quarterback by making up a premise about other people.

If you say something enough, it seems to become true.

Watch out for those who use terms like: everyone, all of us, etc.

Those are loaded words, and they are never (pretty emphatically) true.

Watch out for those who play the martyr.

Some thrive on pity.  They will take a minor, personal issue and claim the world is against them.  It gives them their food… attention.

Watch out for those who set the premise.

Challenge the premise.  Don’t let them get away with it.  Call them on it.  Ask, “Who says that?” or, “That is not what happens, and saying it doesn’t make it so.”

Don’t let others set the premise of your life.

I heard a politician make an erroneous assertion once and was actually challenged on it.  His answer… “Regardless, then blah, blah, blah…”  It should have been over; game, set, match.  However, the other candidate let him continue giving a “solution” to a problem that he had made up.  That kills me.

Others do not get to tell who you are, especially when it comes out of their own hurts.  Anyone who takes a personal hurt or issue and makes it public does so at the risk of exposing themselves in the lie that they tell.  I have also found that most people challenge and chastise others with the very thing that they have issues with themselves.

If they can make someone else seem worse then they themselves will not seem as bad.

Disclaimer: this was really spurred on by the premise set against Tim Tebow and not about anyone in particular.  Any resemblance to your situation was purely unintentional, but is a bonus.

Walking In Humility

A humble heart.  A contrite spirit.  A willingness to reflect and respond.

Those are great descriptions of the one I want in leadership around me.

There are many times when we don’t have the whole story.  In this world of instant communication, we all have seen a tweet or facebook post that was sent as an impulse rather than as a well thought out response to an item of interest.  We all have experienced, or even been a part of, a time when someone lost it.  To paraphrase a quote… rather than be thought a fool, they opened their mouth (actions) and removed all doubt.

So, what’s my heart?

A leader needs to be big enough to admit when they have blown it.

We all act out in ways that are improper at times.  We want what we want or we see what we see and don’t know a whole story and then we shoot off at the mouth or with our actions and feel like we have righted a wrong.  It is necessary for leadership to have a heart that would be willing to reflect on the past moment, day or week and feel the tug of the Spirit saying, “You really didn’t handle that well.”  Then, when we feel that correction, we need to respond accordingly.

• Repentance of the thought or action itself before God
• Reconciliation to the one who was the target of our tirade

A leader needs to be pro-active to keep the emotions in check.

It’s a double-edged sword, this one is.  I want the leaders who walk with me to feel.  I want their compassion and spiritual awareness triggers to be wired with sensitivity and not wait too long for an appropriate response.  However, I also want them to not be governed by the unhealthy emotional responses that so many guide their actions by.

While I hope all learn to see be sensitive to the nudging of the Holy Spirit as to how they need to correct actions that were out of line; I want them to learn to never lose it in the first place.  In other words, if you’re going to make a mistake, [in this case an emotional mistake] then make a new one.  Learn from the times you blow it.  Make the times you blow it become less and less.  A leader should grow, and while being ever willing they should work to make it less and less the times they say, “I’m sorry.  Please forgive me.”

Look for the best, and grow up.

There are times when you are wronged.  Get over it.  There are multiple more times when you are not wronged its just you’re a baby.  Grow up.  You are loved.  There is value enough in you that we look past the crap that makes up your flaws and love you and put up with you while God and you are working it out of your system.  Learn to give the same leeway to others.

Get up.

Yup, you blew it.  Come with us and let’s move forward.  Quit wallowing in it and bringing it back up.  It’s over.  If you have walked through (and continue to walk through) the previous steps then all is good.  If you refuse to get up and allow God to heal you of the hurt that causes this in the first place, then know this:

• God loves you
• We love you
• You can’t lead right now
• There will always be a second chance when you allow God to begin the work in you again

On Special Speakers …

A couple of nights ago I visited a local church to hear a friend speak.  This man is my father’s age, but is a friend non-the-less.  I think a lot of him for various reasons, which is only verified by the fact that I went to hear him speak.  As an explanation of that let me just say that there are not a lot of people, preachers or otherwise, that I would go out of my way to hear speak.  Judge me or not, that’s the truth.

Anyway, one thing that I admire about him is that when he speaks you hear his heart.  He speaks of his story and the overwhelming love of Christ that changed his life, and then invites others to have an encounter with the Lord of his life, Jesus.  This allowed me a moment to share some of the things that I look for in a guest speaker/teacher, and the reason why I don’t allow a lot of them.

A guest speaker needs to be real.

If I invite them, then they don’t have to prove themselves to anyone.  They need to be real, because the people they are speaking to are real.  Many tend to become caricatures of themselves or a generic idea of a preacher/speaker rather than just being themselves.  While others might not be able to see through it, I do; and in those times I make a mental note not to have that person back.

A guest speaker needs to understand the flow.

I know you have prepared something, and I know it’s really good.  Still, be flexible.  Know who the audience is.  Know what time it is.  Know that not everything will be perfect in the setting and just flow with it.  Don’t get thrown off by awkwardness, just embrace it.  The atmosphere of the room means as much as the clock on the wall or the setting of the moment.  Understand it, and rock with it roll with it.

A guest speaker needs to understand they don’t have to “fix” everything.

This is the most important.  Some roll with the idea that they have experienced something no one else has.  Maybe, maybe not.  Here are some points.

• Realize you don’t understand the story.  You see what you see, but you don’t see all that you don’t see.  There are things that have happened and not happened that have led up to that moment.
• Don’t talk down to those you speak to.  They are not stupid.  Speak to them, not down to them.
• Just because you think it should be better doesn’t mean it should.  Maybe you are wrong.  Maybe it is exactly where it all should be at that particular stage of the game.
• Know that the leadership has dreams too.  Sometimes we see things as they are and assume that the leadership wants them that way.  The reality is that leaders dream, and see things as they need to be.  Shepherd/Missional leaders see things as they need to be, and are willing to put up with them as they are until they get where they need to be.  They are leading them out and don’t need someone degrading them about pace.
• Not everyone is hung up with the same stuff.  We get on a kick in church that we talk a lot about not being “too religious” or how we have to start letting younger people do their thing and not argue over music and dress and coffee in the sanctuary and things.  The truth is that those are non-issues in a lot of places, so why even bring it up?  Move on.

A guest speaker must appreciate context.

You don’t have to dress like the ones you speak to or whatever; but you must know where you are.  Had a guest speaker one time who was around the loop of our denominational structure a lot.  The people who he was about to speak to would not understand those references.  I took a moment to explain that and it saved him from some blank stares.

Be yourself.  Share the story of Jesus and offer a way for the person to change.  Love the people like they are the best in the world, understand they didn’t have to be there to listen to you, and honor those in leadership who gave you the stage to speak on in the first place.  That’s all.

Don’t Even Breathe

There is a saying that I like to repeat from time to time:

Don’t blow out someone else’s candles to make yours shine brighter.

I’m not sure where I heard it, so for now I will say it is one that I made up.  The essence of the statement goes beyond the fact that the lower the number of people blowing on the candles will mean less spit on the cake; it really is about allowing others to shine.  In my last post, I mentioned a leadership principle of not always having to toot your own horn.  In fact, in leadership in the church world there should always be more prayer and principle than politics, not to mention the fact that horn tooting should be done only to direct everyone’s attention to Jesus rather than yourself.

One of the items of my heart and the heart of our ministry is that it is a good thing to let another shine.  Here’s how it’s done.

Walk in and create an atmosphere of building up, not tearing down.

Ever been around a person whose total, and I mean total, idea of relational humor is to cut others down.  You know this type of person… every statement is a remark about ability or style or value or etc.  In fairness, good clean ribbing at a close buddies expense is fine and even funny/healthy for one or two times.  It helps us all learn to laugh at ourselves when appropriate.  Do this more than a couple of times, though, and you cease to be a person who “picks on you because they like you.”  You begin to be a jerk.

There is a line.  Leadership in the world of Christ needs to be about creating a safe environment for others to be their best.  It should always build up.  It should always point toward hope.

Realize that someone else being built up doesn’t make you less.

In God’s economy, He doesn’t use pie charts.  Ever seen a pie chart?  In the circular pie, there is a finite space that is broken up into segments, or pieces of the pie.  If you make one segment bigger then another must become smaller.  It is what finite means.  There is only so much to go around.

God doesn’t work this way.  He has an infinite amount of… well… everything.  When praise or blessing or favor is placed in another’s lap, you have to realize that there is still more than enough of all of that to be place in yours when the time is right.  You only need to be concerned about ONE thing becoming less, and that is you.  When you decrease, God increases.

Leave their candles alone.

Referring back to my saying above… stop trying to make who you are seem better by tearing down another.  Instead of blowing someone else’s “candles” out, why not try joining in on the song.  In fact, sing the loudest.  Learn to be the cheerleader for those around you.

“But won’t everyone be looking at them and forget about me,” you ask?  Yes, yes they will; cause it’s not your day.  Live with it.  Guess what?  You get a birthday soon, then all will be looking at you.  If you have cheered for others when it is their time to shine, you will have cheerleaders of your own when it is your time in the spotlight.  It should be more about the other person being praised, I know; but the added bonus is you get to have your own candles at times.

Keep yourself from blowing out the praise of others.  Don’t tear down others even in “fun”.  The target may laugh on the outside, but on the inside they want to hit you with a frying pan.  Be bigger than that… hold your breath and dole out the praise.  Being the guy that “ruins the cake” only makes you seem smaller.